Nicole Polizzi

“The party's here!”

“I'm not trashy, unless I drink too much.”

“Meatball problems.”

“Where's the beach?”

“Being a mother is not about what you gave up to have a child, but what you’ve gained from having one.”

“Pickles is my thing.”

“A crow looked at me. It was a crow. Crows are, like, the devil's birds.”

“I feel like a pilgrim from the 20s.”

“I have a spray tan. It's my life.”

“I'm a vet now, I'm a guidette.”

“I'm trying to be a classy meatball.”

“That was the best day of my life, getting arrested.”

“My ideal man is a guido. Big, muscly, tanned.”

“It's frickin' freezing. I'm from Chile, it's hot there.”

“I don't go tanning anymore because Obama put a 10 percent tax on tanning. And I feel like he did that intentionally for us. McCain would never put a 10 percent tax on tanning.”

“WAH!”