David Steinberg

“In Canada, we have a Prime Minister, not a President. It's a much more low-key affair.”

“The most important thing in comedy is to have a point of view. And it's also the most important thing in life.”

“Stand-up is the only art form where the artist is the writer, director, and star, and you have to get an immediate reaction.”

“I was never controversial. The world was.”

“Directing is a lot like stand-up. You're trying to get a certain reaction. You're trying to get a laugh, or you're trying to get a tear.”

“The Old Testament is a book of 'begats.' Lot begat... and so on. Lot's wife, of course, was a pillar of salt. Why a pillar of salt? We don't know. God has his reasons.”

“The two most brilliant people I've ever met were Johnny Carson and Norman Lear.”

“I always thought that if you're a comedian, you have to be able to do an hour. You can't just be a five-minute comedian.”