Helen Rowland

“A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.”

“The follies which a man regrets most in his life are those which he didn't commit when he had the opportunity.”

“Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.”

“A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often.”

“Love, the quest; marriage, the conquest; divorce, the inquest.”

“When you see what some girls marry, you realize how they must hate to work for a living.”

“Falling in love consists merely in uncorking the imagination and bottling the common sense.”

“A wise woman puts a grain of sugar into everything she says to a man, and takes a grain of salt with everything he says to her.”

“A bride is a woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.”

“Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.”

“Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near.”

“To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.”

“A bachelor is a man who has been lucky in love.”

“It is a woman's business to get married as soon as possible, and a man's to keep unmarried as long as he can.”

“Flirtation is the gentle art of making a man feel pleased with himself.”

“A man is as old as he's feeling, a woman is as old as she looks.”

“A bachelor gets tangled up with a lot of women in order to avoid getting tied up to one.”

“An optimist is a man who has never had much experience.”

“Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess, and yet all the honesty in the world ain't lawful tender for a loaf of bread.”

“Home is any four walls that enclose the right person.”