Dating Quotes

“Bloody men are like bloody buses - you wait for about a year and as soon as one approaches your stop, two or three others appear.”

“I'm a pretty cheap date. I don't need to be wined and dined. I'm just happy to be with a girl I enjoy.”

“A woman called me interesting once, and it was the worst thing I've ever heard.”

“I think the best way to get a guy to like you is to be yourself and not be insecure.”

“The perfect man is a man who can be a friend and a lover and a soul mate, and has a great sense of humor, and has a great body, and is very successful...and is a fictional character.”

“The only thing that's been a worse flop than my love life is my investment portfolio.”

“Searching for a boy in high school is as useless as searching for meaning in a Pauly Shore movie.”

“It's the bad girls who get the guys.”

“I have a lot of boyfriends, I want you to write that. Every country I visit, I have a different boyfriend. And I kiss them all.”

“He was the kind of man who has so many women you could never be jealous of any one of them.”

“We're not trying to convert people; we're just trying to get a date.”

“My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.”

“Never date a woman who has a child that is not yours.”

“This brother told me a secret on how to get more chicks.”

“Kissing a man with a beard is a lot like going to a picnic. You don't mind going through a little bush to get there!”

“Well, some people try to pick up girls and get called assholes. This never happened to Pablo Picasso.”

“My love life is like a piece of Swiss cheese. Most of it's missing, and what's there is riddled with holes.”

“If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near forty.”

“Horror movies are the best date movies. You're sitting in the dark, you're scared, you're holding on to the person next to you.”

“To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior.'”